Tied in Red Tape

THERE has been a lot of talk about “red tape” lately; even one of our previous treasurers, Peter Costello, stated recently that we were “drowning in red tape”, which inspired me to pen this ditty.



Red tape what a mistake

we have created…

although I take no bow.

Red tape what a state

to be in…

captured in our own sin

red tape.

In red tape

we asphyxiate

take it from me


Talk about being a volunteer

that’s jolly good cheer

you want to do

a good deed but all you need

is red tape

forget it mate!

Say I just want to die

but before you go

I tell you no lie

it’s red tape mate!

Well when I go to heaven

don’t tell me even then

it’s red tape.

It’s red tape mate

St Peter don’t open

that pearly gate

unless you’ve got

the red tape mate!

So it leaves me to wonder

and cry asunder

where does all the red tape

go mate?

Ask the dog

who chases his tail

he’ll give you

the good mail

He’ll say mate

it’s just like

chasing your tail

mate, that’s red tape!