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The ten crappiest things you can buy at tomorrow’s police auction

Rachel FennerEastern Reporter

FORGET the amazing 1960s era Monaro, the quad bike or the vintage bikes – we’re loving tomorrow’s WA Police forfeited and unclaimed property auction for its more “unique” items.

We’ve listed our ten favourite crappy items here.

1 Three seashells (one broken)

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An essential buy for anyone who yearns for the relaxing noise of the ocean but with no time to visit the beach.

2 Canvas shopping bags and a small beige outdoor cushion

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No need to fret about the plastic bag ban, here are some amazing reusable bags. The MKR bag is practically a collectable.

3 An ant plant holder, broken owl statuette and vase

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For those still devastated about not getting a letter to Hogwarts – console yourself with a broken owl statue that kinda, sorta looks like Hedwig and an ant with a plant.

4 More owls

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People who are scared of owls are called ochlophobics, so here is a collection perfect for ochlotragicums.

5 A box of springs

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Do you need something to give you a bit of bounce in the morning? Forget the cup of coffee, here’s a box of springs.

6 A broken VB scoreboard

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It can’t keep score anymore, but that doesn’t diminish the charm of this Very Best branded scoreboard.

7 Impulse body spray

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Smell like the 90s with this collection of Impulse body spray – even better, take it into the office and give your workmates migraines.

8 Multiple lots of foreign currency

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You…… might be getting a bargain. We don’t know it’s Friday afternoon and we can’t be bothered checking the exchange rate.

9 Swan Pendant

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You can now wear your love for WA and colonialism around your neck. This necklace commemorates the 150th anniversary of the Swan River colony.

10 A briefcase of bike parts

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Look like a busy professional executive by walking around with this briefcase, no one will ever know it’s full of bike parts!

Check out more items by clicking here.