EXCLUSIVE: State Government to introduce cycling licence

Stock image.
Stock image.

CYCLISTS will have to pass a “riding test” and be licensed to use Perth’s bike paths and roads in new laws set to be introduced in State Parliament today.

Speeds will be capped at 25km/h along the principal shared path network, and the speed limits will be enforced by a squad of patrolling bicycle police, bike multanovas and drones.

A spokesperson for Premier Mark McGowan said he was right behind the new laws.

More cycling routes for Perth’s eastern suburbs

“Mark’s red hot on this,” the spokesperson said.

“He took the old treadlie out for a roll along the Baldivis freeway bike path just after New Year.

“Anyway, a couple of hundred metres in, he gets swamped by a bloody peloton – people in lycra, riding past at 50km/h.

“Poor Mark thought he’d blundered his way into the flaming Giro d’Italia – he just about sh*t himself.

“That was it – next day he’s come in and says ‘these cyclists are out of control’. We’ve gotta do something.”

Cyclists will need to pass a basic test to ensure key competencies, such as signalling properly when turning and ensuring they are polite to other road users.

Once accredited they will be permitted to use their bikes on the PSP and roads.

They will also need to present their licence when purchasing cycling apparel, with mandatory skin-fold tests to determine the most suitable clothing types.

Sights like this could soon be a thing of the past.

“One of Mark’s big things is – if you’re 10-20 kegs overweight, then all the lycra in the world’s not going to speed you up anyway,” the spokesperson said.

“Reece Whitby rode into Parliament one day in one of those red BMC tops, the clip-in pedals – the whole bit.

“Mark and Fran Logan and Simone McGurk called him ‘Cadel’ the whole day.

“Papalia found him crying in the dunny. He got an Uber home and hasn’t rode in since.”

Phase two of the plan involves a toll to use certain high-traffic PSPs, with money raised to fund improvements to the network.

Today’s date is April 1.